How to find a bull — and how to tell a good one from a dud

Where to actually find a bull, how to filter out fakes, creeps and time-wasters, the vetting steps that keep you safe, and what a great first meeting looks like — written for husbands and couples.

October 26, 2026 · 8 min

Sooner or later every couple in this hits the same wall. You've talked, you've played with the fantasy in bed, she's said "okay… maybe". And now the question is: who?

This is where a lot of couples get burned. Either they grab the first guy who sends a dick pic with "hey sexy", or they spend six months chatting with fifty profiles and meet nobody. Neither is fun. In this guide I'll walk you through where to look, what a good bull actually is, how to vet him, and how to set up a first meeting that's hot instead of awkward.

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